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Monday, June 05, 2006

6-6-06: Celebrating Halloween in June 

Tomorrow the world ends. Or so some journalists say some folks think. Women want labor to be induced so Jr. can't be accused of being spawned from Satan's seed. The Omen will bring demonic doom to theaters. (We've all seen those 6-6-06 billboards.) Ann Coulter, "wearing a simple cross above her sacred cleavage," releases her Godless book. Hell, Mich., where the Dam Site inn serves drinks called Bloody Devils, is having a party where schoolchildren pass through the Gates of Hall. Slayer was to start its Unholy Alliance Tour, until a band member fell ill. Other acts, even though Tuesday is normally album release day, wouldn't be caught dead giving birth to a new CD tomorrow. Online outlet Radio Free Satan plans Satan's Rockin' 666 Eve tonight in L.A. Here's a Daily News piece that says 666 might be a misreading, that the real spooky number was 616. And there's the lampoony Landover Baptist Church site, with a checklist of tips for Christian mothers, titled "Is My Child the Devil's Son?" Among its helpful hints (a la HELLoise?): "Ladies, keep your legs crossed until after midnight ... make sure that the child is kept in a chicken cage on the hospital floor ... and check under your child's testicles for any peculiar markings." Me, I'm going to play the lottery ... 666, of course.


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